12.03.2009

an unsettled mind has reasons to stay

plagued by the fear of not having enough time to do it all, i jump from one thing to another, one place to the next. spontaneity is righteous. but not appreciating the worth of time is a curse. through the years i have gained a greater understanding for patience, and it has taught me to take spontaneity by the reigns. i am in control now. and fear cannot scare me into abandoning my challenges.

it was a fluke that i landed in this tiny desert town the first time around. the second time was two weeks later when i and former partner showed up with uhaul in tow. 10 months later, here i am, nothing as it first was, but yet opportunity abounds! with the weight of business responsibilities it is very easy to get discouraged and to convince myself that all things desired for the coming year will be put on hold, again. but i'll be damned if i let a little something, anything, anyone, get in the way of fullfilling my desires. it is the positive energy of endearing friends that is a constant reminder of all that is possible. if i choose to only let positive energy through my front door then i will have an army to defeat the negative.

i had, for the past several months, been making plans to leave Marathon next June apon entering a yoga program in Arizona. after yoga, i had no plans as to where i would go next. in a good way, that was scarey. it opened my eyes to the possibility of returning here. when i actually stopped to consider it, i had more reasons to stay than to leave. it wasn't even one week later that i met a kindred spirit, and together we created the most beautiful of Garden projects. i say we created, but she did more teaching and i did more learning. we have now drawn in 3 other women with the common interest of sustainability. each with our various levels of expertise and strengths, we make nothing less than a perfect combination of woman's work force. this project originated with the simple complaint, "when the local grocery store can't consistanly stock produce, and i can't just go out to my backyard and pick a squash, then something's wrong. all i wanted was a squash !!" from there we took the need to sustain and ran full force with the wind. we have almost 10 acres to play with, complete with well and windmill...the two most important factors...the where and how. in a matter of weeks we have devised detailed plans for community composting, farm to table strategies, public property beautification, and student involvement both on an elementary and university level. this is giant. and has potential to overwhelm. but when i break down the sub-projects it's nothing more than a novel with dozens of little chapters. you can't get to the next without finishing this one first. and this is what is bringing me back after Arizona. i gotta finish this book. it's too good to put down.

there are too many reasons why this project is dear to my heart. it pulls on my heart strings in so many places. for starters, it brings me closer to the earth and all her elements, a creature that i'm inherently connected to. it calls on community involvement, something that is also very important to me as power ladders really grind on my nerves, not to mention i don't work well under. it gives me the hands on experience i will need for future plans of off the grid retreat. i will gain a more in depth knowledge of medicinal herbs and plants, how to process the nut, grain and fruit baring plants and trees. it will give me something to look back on and be proud that i did something to give back to our earth, and the townspeople of Marathon, as this project is meant to flourish with little if any maintenance. this, is Permaculture.

today's tidbit:
a logo that reminded me of Ruby Petunia when she gets in the nip

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