(this is when i fell in love)
owning my own coffee shop was a road i'd never traveled, and i didn't bat an eye at the opportunity of opening one. the challenges that arose were ones i'd never encountered. it's amazing how capable we are of switching modes of thinking when put under pressure. or maybe it's just me. but it is not any easy ball to balance. when i flipped the signs, closed the doors and turned the key, my day still wasn't over. my work went home with me. and in every way un-imaginable. i don't think i ever managed to balance that ball. eventually, day trips to La Linda or the hot springs were not appealling, alpine seemed too far away, and there was never enough hours in a night...which was an odd thing for me to understand because usually there's not enough hours in my day. even socializing over one margarita at the local bar didn't seem worth the effort.
there were things i had to do as a sole proprieter that were completely foreign to me. like learning about the Texas Workforce Commission, State Comptroller, Forms 940 and 941, Quarterly Sales Tax, End of Year Goods, Employees with-holdings...and finally hiring a real Accountant. and then there were things i'd done before but never on this level. like budgeting, advertising, menu creating, pr-ing, hiring (and settling for less than ideal), planning for 3 months of slower than slow foot traffic, juggling the entire dining room and all it's duties single handedly because i am my only employee (besides the cook) on all 7 days of the week....ahhhhhh!!!
i am certain that i have gained a sense of business womanship over this past year, along with how not to co-operate with a business partner. i am also certain that i've lost my sense of humor, my spontaneity, the ability to relax and read a book, the security of "there's always tomorrow".
fortunately for me, i live in west Texas where the tumble weed roll, the feral cats abound, and there are plenty of minutes in a day to count the rotations of a ceiling fan as i kick back in a rocker with a cold Horchata in one hand and a homemade potato taquito in another. NOW i can enjoy it here!
i no longer resent this small town of Marathon, but rather appreciate it's capabilities...or rather, the capabilities i have for myself here. if it weren't for all my hard work, i never would have made a name for myself amongst the locals. in the upcoming months i have several small odd jobs to fulfill. ALL of which i was asked to do. there are even some jobs that i haven't accepted yet!
for my first few weeks as a semi-unresponsible free woman, i plan on keeping a low, very low, profile. part of this plan also includes not over obligating myself to work. when have i ever not worked? but this time i'm really going to try not getting too involved. i think i can do it this time. i want to regain my sense of spontaneity, i want to be able to devour a book in one night, i want to end the day thinking "check the mail? there's always tomorrow". i need some liberation!!!
along with this not getting involved involves a little bit of fear. i am literally starting all over again. not just a new chapter, but a new book. when i think of it that way my head is full with instant daydreams of places i've never laid eyes on...specifically, everything wester than west texas. there is so much to see and do, i vow to NEVER work that much, and will make a balance with everything i do. since i preach balance i might as well be practicing it too.
p.s. i can't wait to have something funny to talk about!!!
that sounds like a fabulous plan! enjoy.
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